1Peter 4:7 Love will cover a multitude of sins.
It was September of 2005 and I had just started my job at the hospital. I was taking care of a young woman with end-stage AIDS. Her body was severely battered by years of drug addiction and AIDS had taken its toll on her. All she wanted to do was lie in bed and wait for her pain medications. She looked like a shell of a person lying there. There was no eye contact, no expression. She didn't want to shower or even talk. She just waited to die. Her condition saddened me and I called out to the Lord for help. God placed her on my heart and I started to pray for her daily. I asked that the Lord how I could minister to her and also that He would open a door so I could share with her about the love of Jesus. Day after day as I cared for her, I would try different avenues to get on the subject, but the door was completely closed. I remember telling the Lord that it was impossible to share with her because her heart was closed to anything spiritual. She was discharged from the hospital one day and I never saw her again.
Over a year later, I returned from the hospital after maternity leave. I hadn’t worked for some time. I grabbed my coffee and listened to report. I was surprised when I heard Becky was one of my patients. I was sure she had probably passed away. During morning rounds, I went into her room and she was sitting up in a chair writing in a journal. Becky was reading a little prayer book that one of the priests from the hospital had given her. I introduced myself again and told her that I remembered her. She shared a little bit about herself. Becky said that she had gotten into drugs very early in life. She explained that she had three kids, all of which she had lost custody of, and she had gotten AIDS from IV drug use. I had a small window of opportunity to tell her just a little bit about what Jesus had done in my life. She was a little more open about talking about spiritual things, but she still seemed distant and had a wall up. Every chance I got, I glorified God and shared all that God was doing in my life. I had hoped and prayed that God would open a door for me to share how Jesus wanted to give her a new life, but as the days went by, I realized the opportunity to do this was slipping by. Her discharge date was set in a couple of days.
The next day, I drove across town to Gospel Supplies so I could buy her a bible. It wasn't just any bible. I wanted to get her one with big letters because she had AIDS-related meningitis that damaged her eyes. I also wanted to get her name engraved on it so that she could call this bible her own. I went and purchased her pretty, red bible and I brought it up to her in hopes that we would be able to talk more. She seemed thankful, but I still never had an opportunity to share with her about this matchless love that can only come from Jesus.
It was over a month later and a day before Thanksgiving, 2005, I stopped in to work because I had to pick up some paperwork. I wasn’t even in my uniform, but I heard someone from behind me call my name. I turned around and it was Becky. She said excitedly, "I have been looking for you." She told me that she had a relapse with her drugs and she had gotten readmitted to the hospital three days earlier. For the past three days, she had been walking up and down the hallways looking for me and wondering if I was going to be at work. She had just prayed that she would see me and there I was! I walked with her for a while. I noticed how broken she looked. She had really come to the end of her rope. She explained she wanted to find me to let me know how special her bible was to her. She said, “I had no idea that you had engraved my name on the cover of the bible. I have shown every doctor and nurse who comes into my room my new bible and I hold it up and say this is my bible!” Friends, may we never underestimate the power of love. It covers a multitude of sin and it NEVER fails. Becky went on to explain that every time she felt like doing drugs, she would pull her bible out and read it. When she did, the feelings to go and do drugs would leave her. It made me want to cry for her. I saw her in her eyes how much she longed to be free and that God had touched her heart through His Word.
She invited me to sit with her for a while and the anointing of God was in the room. I shared that I had been praying for her and I sensed the Lord had opened the door for this appointment. I asked Becky if I could share with her how she could go to heaven. God had totally opened up her heart and she listened intently to everything I said. When I asked her if she wanted to repent and receive eternal life, she nodded her head and closed her weary eyes as I led her in prayer. She sat on her hospital bed repenting and asking Jesus to be her Lord and Savior. For the first time, I saw joy light up her face. I just wanted to cry with her because I knew that the Lord set a wretch like me free and He was doing His mighty work again. He had created another beautiful masterpiece by His blood.
Right before I left Becky’s room, I asked if I could lay hands on her and pray for her health. She asked if I could pray for healing of her body and that God would deliver her from her drug addiction. I prayed over her and spoke the Word of God over her and her addiction. I told her the Lord had the power to deliver her and she could believe Him because He was worthy. I have never seen such a change in a person's demeanor as I saw after she had received the powerful blood of Jesus. Praise God that even when we give up on ourselves, He is faithful to never give up on us.
As I walked down the hall and out of the hospital, I realized how much I had to be thankful for on Thanksgiving. I thought about my own salvation and how freely Jesus forgave a sinful woman like me. I write this to encourage all of you on this Thanksgiving 2010. For all of you who have prayed for your family and friends to be saved and have lost hope, be encouraged on this Thanksgiving season and believe with me for the salvation of our loved ones. The Lord’s hand is not too short to reach those we see as unreachable. We serve a God who has the power to heal and save mightily. I prayed for this woman that I didn't even know and God answered me in all of His glory and power. Now what more do you think our Father in heaven will do for those His own children hold up in prayer? When it really comes down to it, what else is there? It’s just God's perfect love for us and the precious gift of salvation through Christ Jesus our Lord. May you have a blessed Thanksgiving as we see the Lord’s work in our own lives and as we continue to see the gospel go out and touch the lives of those we see who do not yet know Him.
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
God is Mighty
I rushed out the grocery store making my escape to the van. My six week old daughter was hungry and not about to wait. As I made my way across the parking lot, there I saw her. Our eyes met. As if I knew what she was going to ask, I quickly shifted my eyes to the asphalt hoping she wouldn't notice me. As she took two steps towards me, I heard the dreaded request. "Do you have any spare change?" With a sigh, I replied, "No, no spare change." I was annoyed as I moved quickly to my van. I just wanted to get home to feed my baby and relax. Could they not understand my body language and my annoyance when they asked me for money, I wondered. She promptly thanked me after I said no and I hurried on my way. Deep in my spirit, I thought how this homeless lady still mattered to God and as a daughter of the King, she should matter to me also.
Thoughts came flooding back to my heart as I remembered what Pastor Fernando told me months earlier. He said he never gave money when homeless people asked, but he would give them fruit or whatever he had from his lunch. I got to my van and buckled my daughter in her car seat. I looked in my grocery bag at the one loaf of bread and carton of yogurt at the bottom of the bag. A drew in a deep breath as I felt the Lord prompting me to share the little I had. I drove across the parking lot to the woman. I opened my window and called out to her. She came over to my window. I said, "I have no money, but I do have a yogurt if you want it." She smiled a sad smile and thanked me for sharing. She was about 40 years old, thin, weathered, and one of the loneliest souls I had ever seen. It showed on her face all of the pain and sorrow her life had offered her. I saw the dissatisfaction that that squashed her hopes and dreams that resulted from believing the lie that the world had something to offer her. The world had left her void of any peace, joy, or love. All of a sudden, like a flood, I got such an overwhelming feeling of love that flowed in my heart for this woman. What spilled out of my mouth at that moment would do nothing short of changing this woman's life in an instant. Tears welled up in my eyes and I said, "I want you to know that Jesus loves you." Just the sound of that name changes people...that beautiful name, Jesus. A flash of hope lit up in her eyes and I saw that my Mighty God had had touched her deep in her soul. "I appreciate you telling me that," she said. "I have been very, very down lately and I needed to hear that."
For a few moments we were like old friends catching up. She started opening up to me about her life. She told me her name was Cynthia and that she was homeless and hungry. She had contracted a rare blood disease that was causing her to be sick. The doctors told her that she didn't have long to live. She shared with me the hurt she had in her heart that she could trace back as far as she could remember. Over the past couple of days she explained that things had gotten so bad for her that she didn't want to get up and face another day. She thought to herself just hours before that she hoped to either die on her own or that she would commit suicide. Tears flowed down my face as I pointed to Jesus for her solution. I explained that the Lord sent me to talk with her and that He was willing and able to to change her life and heal her.
Cynthia had been very sick recently from her disease and she had been thinking a lot about God and heaven and when I asked her if she knew she was going to heaven, she said this very question plaqued her heart. All the while it tugged at her heart, she was completely unsure of her eternal destiny. My heart flowed out Living Water as the scripture talks about. The power of Jesus just flowed through my heart as I sat in awe of God. He was opening the door for me to share with this woman and I was privileged to be a part of His glorious work. My daughter, on the other hand, was not very excited. She was starting to cry because she was hungry.
By the power of the Holy Spirit, I invited Cynthia into my van to drive across the parking lot. This is something I would never recommend. When I think back, I knew I was being led by the Holy Spirit because this is something so contrary to what I would do on my own. I would never invite anyone into my car, especially with my 6 week old baby in the car with me. We quietly drove through the parking lot to the resturant where I would give her something to eat that would satisfy her for a while, but also share with her the Bread of Life that would last forever.
As we sat down together at the table, she ate as if it were her last meal. I knew she was hungry for food. But what I started to realize was she was more hungry for eternal security and the love of Jesus. I told her that even more than the food she was eating or any amount of money in the world, what I was about to share with her was worth more than Gold. I sat and nursed my daughter as I shared the gospel with this stranger. Cynthia cried as she accepted forgiveness and invited Jesus into her heart. While I prayed with her, she took in a very deep breath. After I finished, she said that she had not been able to breath in deeply in so long because of this heaviness she had in her chest. She explained that while I was praying for her that God had lifted something from her and she was able to take a deep breath. God had forgiven all of her sins and removed the burden from her.
The Lord removed her sin and I visited with my new friend. She was now my sister and part of my family. I was so cut to the heart when she shared her life with me. She had been living in an abandoned home with no furniture or electricity. She shared that her childhood was very difficult and she never felt any love in her home. The Lord revealed to me that she had been wounded and deeply hurt by abuse as a child. As if being unloved isn't enough, her brother had committed suicide 6 years earlier. It broke her heart so much that she gave up on God. She realized as the Holy Spirit worked in her heart that she had been mad at God for her brother dying. I told her, "I assure you, Cynthia, God has never given up on you because He sent me to talk with you today." Jesus was the answer to all of her problems and He wanted to give her a new life and fill her with a joy that couldn't be obtained anywhere except through HIm.
After all of this, she said, "More than the meal you've given me, thank you for taking the time to tell me all of this." In all of her life experience, no one had ever taken the time to talk to her about God. She explained how she had a deep sense of relief in her heart that she was unable to explain. Her smile lit up the room and it gave me great joy to see God be glorified.
When we were getting ready to leave, she pulled out a dirty, crumpled piece of paper with a poem on it. She had written it that morning and this is what it said
My true love, Sent from the Heavens above
As beautiful as a flying white dove
Wanting him, needing him, missing him, and loving him,
I have deep emotions for this man, so much so you just
wouldn't understand.
Life has so many commands and demands,
struggles and strides, so many tears to hide
not really one soul you could honestly confide
Life to me has always been a rough ride,
much loss but not much gained
releasing my tears as it may rain
at times I may feel insane, with no one in particular to blame
I pray day after day, night after night, for my life to just be alright
Yet I know I must not give up, I must try with all of my might
Althoguh I cry myself to sleep almost every night, still I must awake
the next day and put up another fight just to survive and be alright
Written by Cynthia AKA Sinner
I was moved in my heart that she had written this. The man she spoke of in this poem was Jesus and He had given her a new life. He had rescued her from her darkest hour and she was going to be alright. The Lord had done a wonderful thing in this woman's life. I was amazed as I thought about how when people ask me for spare change, how deep inside I have already judged them. But God showed me how it doesn't matter to the Lord if we live in an abandoned building or a high dollar mansion, His spirit wants to reach them and save their lost souls.
I felt blessed as I walked back to my van. I reached in my glove box and handed her a brand new bible that I had been carrying around for months for that special soul that God showed me. She was thankful for her bible and told me she never had one of her own. While we said goodbye, I asked if I could lay hands on her and ask that God would heal her body. As I prayed, I felt God's anointing and I believe by His power He not only healed her spirit, but her body also.
As I drove away, I pondered the greatness of God. I realized the matchless gift God had given me through His adoption. My life with Him was an abundant life and now Cynthia had the same rights to that life I had by taking one step of faith and believing. I smiled as I thought about my wonderful husband, five beautiful children, and an inheritance in heaven that no one can put a price on. I never saw Cynthia again. I often look for her when I go to that grocery store on the west side of town. But I knew I would see her again in eternity, as she had just received from God what every man and woman is looking for...forgiveness.
A friend of mine recently sent me an email and she signed it "God is Mighty." I say, yes He is! My God is so mighty.
Thoughts came flooding back to my heart as I remembered what Pastor Fernando told me months earlier. He said he never gave money when homeless people asked, but he would give them fruit or whatever he had from his lunch. I got to my van and buckled my daughter in her car seat. I looked in my grocery bag at the one loaf of bread and carton of yogurt at the bottom of the bag. A drew in a deep breath as I felt the Lord prompting me to share the little I had. I drove across the parking lot to the woman. I opened my window and called out to her. She came over to my window. I said, "I have no money, but I do have a yogurt if you want it." She smiled a sad smile and thanked me for sharing. She was about 40 years old, thin, weathered, and one of the loneliest souls I had ever seen. It showed on her face all of the pain and sorrow her life had offered her. I saw the dissatisfaction that that squashed her hopes and dreams that resulted from believing the lie that the world had something to offer her. The world had left her void of any peace, joy, or love. All of a sudden, like a flood, I got such an overwhelming feeling of love that flowed in my heart for this woman. What spilled out of my mouth at that moment would do nothing short of changing this woman's life in an instant. Tears welled up in my eyes and I said, "I want you to know that Jesus loves you." Just the sound of that name changes people...that beautiful name, Jesus. A flash of hope lit up in her eyes and I saw that my Mighty God had had touched her deep in her soul. "I appreciate you telling me that," she said. "I have been very, very down lately and I needed to hear that."
For a few moments we were like old friends catching up. She started opening up to me about her life. She told me her name was Cynthia and that she was homeless and hungry. She had contracted a rare blood disease that was causing her to be sick. The doctors told her that she didn't have long to live. She shared with me the hurt she had in her heart that she could trace back as far as she could remember. Over the past couple of days she explained that things had gotten so bad for her that she didn't want to get up and face another day. She thought to herself just hours before that she hoped to either die on her own or that she would commit suicide. Tears flowed down my face as I pointed to Jesus for her solution. I explained that the Lord sent me to talk with her and that He was willing and able to to change her life and heal her.
Cynthia had been very sick recently from her disease and she had been thinking a lot about God and heaven and when I asked her if she knew she was going to heaven, she said this very question plaqued her heart. All the while it tugged at her heart, she was completely unsure of her eternal destiny. My heart flowed out Living Water as the scripture talks about. The power of Jesus just flowed through my heart as I sat in awe of God. He was opening the door for me to share with this woman and I was privileged to be a part of His glorious work. My daughter, on the other hand, was not very excited. She was starting to cry because she was hungry.
By the power of the Holy Spirit, I invited Cynthia into my van to drive across the parking lot. This is something I would never recommend. When I think back, I knew I was being led by the Holy Spirit because this is something so contrary to what I would do on my own. I would never invite anyone into my car, especially with my 6 week old baby in the car with me. We quietly drove through the parking lot to the resturant where I would give her something to eat that would satisfy her for a while, but also share with her the Bread of Life that would last forever.
As we sat down together at the table, she ate as if it were her last meal. I knew she was hungry for food. But what I started to realize was she was more hungry for eternal security and the love of Jesus. I told her that even more than the food she was eating or any amount of money in the world, what I was about to share with her was worth more than Gold. I sat and nursed my daughter as I shared the gospel with this stranger. Cynthia cried as she accepted forgiveness and invited Jesus into her heart. While I prayed with her, she took in a very deep breath. After I finished, she said that she had not been able to breath in deeply in so long because of this heaviness she had in her chest. She explained that while I was praying for her that God had lifted something from her and she was able to take a deep breath. God had forgiven all of her sins and removed the burden from her.
The Lord removed her sin and I visited with my new friend. She was now my sister and part of my family. I was so cut to the heart when she shared her life with me. She had been living in an abandoned home with no furniture or electricity. She shared that her childhood was very difficult and she never felt any love in her home. The Lord revealed to me that she had been wounded and deeply hurt by abuse as a child. As if being unloved isn't enough, her brother had committed suicide 6 years earlier. It broke her heart so much that she gave up on God. She realized as the Holy Spirit worked in her heart that she had been mad at God for her brother dying. I told her, "I assure you, Cynthia, God has never given up on you because He sent me to talk with you today." Jesus was the answer to all of her problems and He wanted to give her a new life and fill her with a joy that couldn't be obtained anywhere except through HIm.
After all of this, she said, "More than the meal you've given me, thank you for taking the time to tell me all of this." In all of her life experience, no one had ever taken the time to talk to her about God. She explained how she had a deep sense of relief in her heart that she was unable to explain. Her smile lit up the room and it gave me great joy to see God be glorified.
When we were getting ready to leave, she pulled out a dirty, crumpled piece of paper with a poem on it. She had written it that morning and this is what it said
My true love, Sent from the Heavens above
As beautiful as a flying white dove
Wanting him, needing him, missing him, and loving him,
I have deep emotions for this man, so much so you just
wouldn't understand.
Life has so many commands and demands,
struggles and strides, so many tears to hide
not really one soul you could honestly confide
Life to me has always been a rough ride,
much loss but not much gained
releasing my tears as it may rain
at times I may feel insane, with no one in particular to blame
I pray day after day, night after night, for my life to just be alright
Yet I know I must not give up, I must try with all of my might
Althoguh I cry myself to sleep almost every night, still I must awake
the next day and put up another fight just to survive and be alright
Written by Cynthia AKA Sinner
I was moved in my heart that she had written this. The man she spoke of in this poem was Jesus and He had given her a new life. He had rescued her from her darkest hour and she was going to be alright. The Lord had done a wonderful thing in this woman's life. I was amazed as I thought about how when people ask me for spare change, how deep inside I have already judged them. But God showed me how it doesn't matter to the Lord if we live in an abandoned building or a high dollar mansion, His spirit wants to reach them and save their lost souls.
I felt blessed as I walked back to my van. I reached in my glove box and handed her a brand new bible that I had been carrying around for months for that special soul that God showed me. She was thankful for her bible and told me she never had one of her own. While we said goodbye, I asked if I could lay hands on her and ask that God would heal her body. As I prayed, I felt God's anointing and I believe by His power He not only healed her spirit, but her body also.
As I drove away, I pondered the greatness of God. I realized the matchless gift God had given me through His adoption. My life with Him was an abundant life and now Cynthia had the same rights to that life I had by taking one step of faith and believing. I smiled as I thought about my wonderful husband, five beautiful children, and an inheritance in heaven that no one can put a price on. I never saw Cynthia again. I often look for her when I go to that grocery store on the west side of town. But I knew I would see her again in eternity, as she had just received from God what every man and woman is looking for...forgiveness.
A friend of mine recently sent me an email and she signed it "God is Mighty." I say, yes He is! My God is so mighty.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)